Un
appello a tutte le donne: smettete di spendere fortune in lingerie intima super
firmata e super sexy e rinunciate a cercare di imitare le dive da calendari
credendo sia l'unico modo per movimentare la propria vita sessuale! Quello di
cui abbiamo bisogno è altro: occorre conoscere
i maschi e comportarsi di conseguenza.
Siete rimaste perplesse? Leggete attentamente questo articolo e, forse al suo
termine avrete le idee più chiare in materia. A sostenere la tesi è
Ian Kerner, 39enne americano di professione sessuologo;
oltreoceano è diventato una celebrità , conduce programmi radiofonici
e televisivi e si occupa di rubriche su molti giornali. Per avere un appuntamento
privato nel suo studio di New York ci si deve inserire in una lunga lista d'attesa;
il suo grande successo deriva certamente dal suo primo
libro indirizzato agli uomini "She Comes First", un'ode al
cunnilingus, cioè
il sesso orale praticato sulla donna.
Il sequel, uscito quest'anno è intitolato "He
comes next", questa volta è stato scritto principalmente
per le donne ed in copertina ritrae una banana sbucciata. Manuali che ci danno
consigli sul sesso, su giochini o tecniche per rimanere indelebili nella memoria
del nostro partner, sono stati scritti in abbondanza. Il più delle volte
si tratta, però di semplici guide per imparare nuovi metodi, spesso scritte
da donne che fanno o hanno fatto dell'eros il loro mestiere, come ex-porno star.
Il libro di Kerner è totalmente diverso,
innanzitutto l'autore è uno specialista in materia e in secondo luogo,
non meno importante, è un uomo.
Chi meglio di un uomo può essere in grado di accompagnarci nella scoperta
della complessa mentalità maschile, svelandoci ogni segreto e rendendoci
tutto assolutamente chiaro e magicamente comprensibile? Cerchiamo quindi di
partire dando alcune delle risposte che ci stanno più a cuore e che potrebbero
semplificare di molto il nostro rapporto con l'altro sesso. Innanzitutto tra
le preziose pagine del manuale viene rivelato che gli
uomini dal sesso si aspettano divertimento, relax e allegria, al contrario
spesso riscontrano solo noia; la loro reazione automatica è quindi quella
di tradire la propria donna o forse peggio di smettere di desiderarla.
Talvolta
in un matrimonio, forse a causa della routine quotidiana, o dei troppi impegni
da cui la coppia si fa inghiottire, succede che l'uomo
diventi più incline alla masturbazione, anche regolarmente, piuttosto
che a dedicarsi alla propria compagna. In situazioni del genere, ci insegna
Ian, che non ci si deve sentire tagliate fuori, escluse, il fatto che il nostro
uomo si masturbi è comunque un segnale che desidera avere una vita sessuale.
Vengono dati altri piccoli ma utili consigli per migliorare il modo di relazionarci
con il partner: bisogna abbassare le difese e lasciarsi
andare, senza vergognarsi di sé stessi e del proprio corpo. Anche
se non sempre è facile, dobbiamo metterci bene in testa che nei momenti
"caldi" un uomo non presta attenzione alla cellulite o ai due chiletti
di troppo accumulati durante l'inverno, soprattutto se mostriamo di essere sicure
di noi e a nostro agio.
Inoltre l'idea che un completino intimo particolarmente provocante possa avere
effetti miracolosi non è del tutto esatta, molto più incisivo
risulta essere guardare negli occhi il proprio lui durante la
fellatio. Al fine di vivere un rapporto lineare e ottimale bisogna,
inoltre, scolpirsi nella mente un concetto fondamentale: gli
uomini e le donne hanno due mentalità diverse per natura, ed anche
nell'amore si manifesta questa differenza: le donne fanno l'amore con tutto
il corpo, gli uomini, invece, concentrano tutta la faccenda intorno ai loro
genitali. Fin da bambini, i maschi sono portati a proteggerli come un gioiello
raro, per esempio è proprio per questo che spesso alcuni uomini sono
preoccupati all'idea della propria fidanzata alle prese con una fellatio: temono
che il loro gioiello possa essere graffiato o strattonato.
Quando si sentono minacciati ed impauriti eiaculano troppo
presto per lo stress e talvolta pur di tirarsi fuori da una situazione che li
rende nervosi, fingono l'orgasmo; se lui viene in fretta non significa
che lei è irresistibile al contrario, più una donna sa prolungare
l'eccitazione fino al limite giusto, più indimenticabile sarà
l'orgasmo per l'uomo. Forse queste rivelazioni di Ian Kerner vi avranno lasciato
indifferenti, nel caso invece hanno sortito in voi un interesse vi consiglio
vivamente di correre in libreria per leggere "He comes next"!
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